Confidence – Knowing who you are

When starting Talking shop, I considered what sort of offering I would bring my audience. Yes, I love fashion and yes I wanted to make it easier for people to feel like they have a handle on their appearance and yes, mainly to help diffuse the noise out there. There is so much noise and so much STUFF out there. And the truth is you don’t need that much stuff, no one does, we’ve just been programmed that way in this digital age and it’s only getting worse .And I’m not writing this to cast judgement but merely to say, that I feel the same way. I always feel like I need this new thing or that new thing, but I have gotten to know myself over the last couple of years and I have discovered that at this stage of my life most of the things I think I need I just merely want them. And by now, I know who and what gets my money.

When people shop they are looking to buy a feeling of confidence, a certain feeling of special even maybe a moment of standout in the crowd if you know what I mean. And that is the great thing about fashion you can buy all those moments BUT only for a fleeting fragment of time. Like Cinderella at the stroke of midnight your special pant looses its power when worn a couple of times and that top that gave you Rhianna like swagger, isn’t as powerful after being featured on your insta a few times.  What ensues is you are left staring at an overflowing closet and thinking to yourself – “I have nothing to wear” bish you do! You are staring at a closest full of clothes! What you mean, is that you don’t have anything in there that will instantly make you feel like you are want to feel- the spark of newness is gone. Well, this is the bad news, I know you have heard it before – only you can make you feel like you want to feel everything else is just an enhancer.

So here is MY sure fast way of getting that feeling of awesome you are looking for in clothes. Confidence. There I said it. That’s the secret. Confidence. Sound easy, but it’s not.  How do you get confidence? By discovering who you are and knowing what you are not. By following your own path even if it seems unappealing to those around you, showing up for yourself, when you would rather do something and anything else-  by backing yourself, in any little way you can. These can be in very little ways, minuscule even- but consistently and persistently these choices build the confidence muscle and before you know it you have discovered what and who you are. Confidence, becomes your compass.

Then, when you want to buy that expensive purse you will be buying it for the right reasons maybe as a reward for your hard work or a symbol of you being a #BOSS and not because you want another person to think highly of you. You won’t need their thoughts or their positive reviews… because you’ve already positively reviewed yourself.

**Ps My jumpsuit is fromZimmermann, but it has unfortunately sold out. But I have selected a few similar killer options for you.

Till next time we talk shop,

x

Also published on Medium.